Captain America: The Winter Soldier Review

From the brother directors (Anthony and Joe Russo) that are still brothers comes a movie that will almost make you forget that they directed You, Me, and Dupree.

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                                      The Wachowski Brothers…err…siblings.

Captain America: The Winter Soldier is the big-budget, lowly-anticipated sequel to Captain America: The First Avenger; it was a decent, but forgettable movie that even made Mr. Smith dull. However, this fun sequel will leave you hungry for a longer winter. But it still won’t make you care more about the Human Torch—I mean Captain America.

Image                                         No wonder he wants to quit acting.

Post-Avengers Captain America (Chris Evans) has been going on SHIELD missions and saving hundreds of lives for a few years. He can jump hundreds of feet onto surfaces without hurting his Abercrombie face, and run two blocks without getting cramps. No matter his strengths, he still feels out of place. He even keeps a pop culture notebook with him at all times to write down all the important inventions, discoveries and art that mankind has contributed to the world while he was hibernating in the Arctic for nearly 70 years. Where would we be without Snapchat, Justin Bieber, and Angry birds after all? Every value and liberty that he fought for during World War II has been surrendered by the people he swore to protect. Governments can now spy on your social networking accounts, phone calls, and emails with permission. This is why it’s important to read Terms of Service Agreements before clicking on “I Accept”.

rs_1024x759-130830150850-1024..miley-cyrus-twerk-vma.ls.83013_copy                                                             Our gift to the world

Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) and Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) also have larger roles this time around. Fury is about to launch a program that will bring security to the entire world. SHIELD has developed three helicarriers ready to fire their weapons at anyone who is believed to be a threat when they post the wrong status on Facebook. Things go wrong when SHIELD members attack Fury below the belt and there is no one he can trust except one man. Captain ‘Merica’s mission: protect a flash drive, expose the traitor, and stop him before he sells it to TMZ.

Nick Fury

                                     I did not have sexual relations with that woman.

Captain America teams up with Sexy Spider-Woman, and newcomer Sam Wilson (Affordable Will Smith) to save SHIELD from an unknown threat while having to fight a villain called the Winter Soldier whose terrifying presence can best be described as a skinnier, shorter Terminator that got fashion advice from Sub-Zero and Scorpion. The Winter Soldier is magnetic every time he’s on the screen. He can match Captain America in combat and he makes a fantastic Ultimate Frisbee buddy. Get ready for a bunch of douchebags dressing up as this guy for Halloween this year.

Anthony and Joe Russo are renowned for their work in comedies, but they successfully made the transition to action in this movie. Car chases? Vin Diesel would be proud. Foot chases that put Tom Cruise’s running to shame? I’m out of breath just thinking about it. Explosions? Boom goes the dynamite! Fight scenes that won’t make you vomit extra butter in your popcorn? Heck yes! You’ll love the action so much that you’ll forget to check your Facebook and Whatsapp messages. Every character gets a chance to show you that your gym membership is a waste of time with stuntwork that is better than most Marvel movies.

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The movie will even have you thinking about our governments’ reach in our post 9/11-world. You’ll consider turning your technology off more often, and ask yourself if you should continue talking to your BFF Siri. You’ll wonder if the people who stare at you on the street are villains, or if you have nacho cheese on your nose. Yes, these themes have been discussed in other movies, TV series, and books, but it’s rare to have an action movie entertain you and make you question anything. Is it worth sacrificing certain liberties if it means you’ll be safe and sound? This might be the only America that even international audiences will like.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes? Who watches the watchmen?

I give Captain America: The Winter Soldier my highest review score of Get To The Theater.

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